December 3rd, 2023
The Complex World of Delulu
Written by Astra Baker
What do you consider to be real?
Do you ever question what you consider to be reality, your reality?
What in your mind makes something qualify as real? Is it if it’s something physical? Or rather does it matter in how you understand or perceive with your senses?
Allow me to sum up all of these questions into just one, ask yourself,
Delulu whether this is your first time hearing the whimsical world or have seen it’s rise to stardom through multiple TikToks is a term and digital trend as a whole that has been misunderstood of it’s origins and it’s full potential of changing your life. Yes you, can be delulu, maybe you have at a point in your life without even realizing partially if you’ve ever had to fake confidence or bravery before. Ever heard “fake it till you make it”, “put your mind to it and it’ll happen” or “everything works out for me in the end” from someone before? Welcome to delulu also known as positive delusions.
What is Delulu?
After much research and dozens of videos essays, articles, Ted Talks and speaking with others, my definition of delulu is To change your life or something about who you are from how it is currently to implement your desire and ultimately change your life/ something about you. I considered taking a quote from an article on who they defined delulu, I figured that would be more official than one I’d come up with but after looking online many of the definitions just didn’t encapsulate what I mean when I speak about delulu, how I’ve used it and the powerful skill it is to have. But that’s just may be because the kind of way us as Gen Z have refined Delulu as a word that got trendy for it’s obscurities scenarios it could create to something that women in their 20’s are telling girls their age and younger to use as a survival tool in reprogramming your thinking to so you can gain confidence is something that’s still not acknowledged by the wide public outside on content that Gen Z and surrounding age groups engage with.
A commonality for how delulu first got it’s start and is still used for today is in Tik Tok made for the purpose of “laughs and giggles” (another TikTok born terms). User @ssunnhee (I’m @ for credit) made a TikTok stating “I will stay delusional. We have never talked? That's fine. He looks at me once? He loves me. He’s avoiding me? He’s playing hard to get. He asked me how to do a math problem? No, basically asked me out. He appears in my dream? I appeared in his. He compliments my outfit? He wants me. He’s touching his hair? It’s for me.” Ladies and Gentlemen, this is delulu, at least the joke of it which did begin it. If you found that amusing that’s the point of the whole trend, people speaking absurdly about their fantasized scenarios with someone either in their real lives, hypothetically or a celebrity that they know is outlandish to state but for the fun of it still do and plays into the belief which the comment section often would as well, this terms origins also with a lot of Kpop stans/super fans with their bias/favorite kpop singer. There however are so TikTokers who have taken a spin on the absurdism that comes with choosing to be delusional and made it to be a tactic for self-improvement instead.
Business and Social Coach @romaneexvirgara made a video with this version of delulu stating, “If you want to be that rich, glamorous girl that does whatever she wants, pilates at 9, nails done at 10, you actually have to be delulu…When I tell you that nothing good ever comes from thinking realistically, I’m telling you that for a reason. Like, when you think realistically you only keep yourself in the exact same position you don’t want to be in. So dream for the stars. Like who are you when you’re making multiple 6 figures? Who are you when you have complete time freedom and then embody that.” In a tough situation in my life, before I even had TikTok I was doing this mentally and it helped me severely as an escapism of sorts to just get out of the hardships of the day and into who I wanted to be until today I can tell you that implements of the ideas of who that idealized person I according to social views was reaching to the stars to even thinking to be is now ensued within and of me. To have been doing this without a name to label it but as a survival of sanity technique it was a resonating feeling to see others on TikTok have been promoting this dear friend of mine and in analyzing this digital trend I took an ocean depth dive into all of this delulu or as I also like to call it positive thinking which is what it is. In our table on content for today we’ll look at some of the people who do fall into more of the delulu that’s used for changing something in your real life rather than just an insiders joke and how they have commonly came to using a reasoning for why and how delulu works for them which is because of their ‘Lucky girl Syndrome’ then we will explore more into the answers to my opening questions from above on what is reality followed by exploring some Laws of the Universe and Quantum Physics (told you it was a deep, deep dive) ending with a talk on human nature of wanting to be seen but the trending obsession we have with wanting to be confident. All required for you reader is an open-mind traveling down the delulu multiverses if you will.
Lucky Girl Syndrome and TikTok’s problematic self diagnosing trend
Would you consider yourself lucky, do you happen to be a girl by any chance, I have a syndrome for you. Tam Kaur, a self improvement and self love content creator with 687.1K+ subscribers on Youtube made a video on that platform talking about this which she proclaims to have detailing, “Lucky girl syndrome is all about reprogramming your mindset into thinking I am good enough, I am smart enough, I am capable enough and I am worthy of all of my desires. Our thoughts, our perceptions, our inner dialogue, becomes our reality. It creates it.” This might seem so harmless and let me tell you I do believe that the people claiming to have this are not doing it out of spite for another else but solely just in the efforts of making content expressing their own happiness and feeling specialness online. Although one conflict of lucky girl syndrome is it’s representor which as you search it up on TikTok you’ll find plenty of videos with young, able bodied, conventionally pretty, fluent English speaking white teens and woman gushing about the luckiness they have in their lives along with drizzles of other races and ethnicities also claiming their lucky girl syndrome although the controversy has produced reply videos to this trend in talking about the logistics of being lucky. The identity of the poster girl I just described all includes privileges that are inherent to them but if someone deals with something that is a double standard or discriminatory in society like being more heavy weighted, Black or having a darker skin tone, having a disability, would you not qualify for lucky girl syndrome too? The Sunday Times best-selling author of Manifest: 7 Steps to Living Your Best Life, self-development coach, manifesting expert, Roxie Nafousi spoke on this issue in SHAPE magazine’s article, “TikTok's 'Lucky Girl Syndrome,' Explained Find out what it is and whether or not it's problematic” stating,"It might also make other people feel that they 'just aren’t lucky enough' and therefore discourage them from taking charge of their lives and creating their own luck." “It also could be argued that believing luck is an entitled luxury for in the privileged." Another issue with lucky girl syndrome is in the trendiness of wanting to be a lucky girl so much that you suppress your own emotions in the effort of creating so much looking on the bright side of things for yourself that you counteractive blindly create toxic positivity for yourself and in the ways you view others. The same SHAPE magazine article Gail Saltz, M.D., associate professor of psychiatry at New York-Presbyterian Hospital Weill-Cornell School of Medicine and host of the Personology podcast conveys, “Toxic positivity refers to feeling the need to always be positive, even when life objectively challenging…. No one feels positively all the time...no one…. "that means a person is using denial, repression, or some defense mechanism to ignore other feelings to always be 'up.” Lucky Girl Syndrome, the gift that keeps on giving, right?
On the contrary though, Tam Kaur is a South-Asian woman of Indian descent who herself says she has lucky girl syndrome which although I can not vouch for what she’d experienced, just based on her identity alone is subjected is discrimination like xenophobia. I’m sure there are some people who in their videos are describing the ways of how being lucky girl applies to them in a very inclusive way especially prompting the videos in response talking about it’s not that they are lucky girls, it’s just that these women are waking up to their privilege that society provides them are are mislabeling it, which can definitely be part of the rise of this trend and the reason for why we see so many similar identifying people participating in it. Yet, like Tam said, it’s about feeling smart and good enough to let your thoughts and dreams become reality and not putting limitations on yourself from the inside. So, in this way lucky girl syndrome can be quantifiable to people of any identity because it’s not about anyone else’s luckiness, it’s about you and your perspective of just how lucky you are which is in many ways showing gratitude for what you do have. Life is about different strokes for different folks but in a grim way, yes privilege is luckiness and even if you aren’t susceptible as the next person to the same kind of wealth or unbiasedness, what you do have can be a duality of two different truths being true at the same time.
In Tam’s video entitled HOW TO HAVE LUCKY GIRL SYNDROME: REAL tips to be the luckiest girl attract your dream life, she shared with her audience tips that ring the bell of many other in how they achieved what they desired which include simplified
one, know you are lucky because the universe (or whatever higher power you believe in) made you so two, reprogram your mind to believing this and three, say your affirmations and manifest and everything will work out. Each steps does become more specified in how to exactly get the best out of your luckiness starting with step 1 techniques how to manifest. Tam explains to write a list of goals ‘nothing is impossible’, print out pictures relating, make vision board and every morning stare at it for a minute so that it doesn’t become unseen or decentralized in your room then visualize yourself living out your dream life before going to bed or whenever through the day, affirm your goals and write a script and practice it like she stated one being “I can’t remember my ex’s name” thus this being improving your self talk so you believe it. The secondary rule of thumb to this is to stay detached, be more focused on not questioning it or stressing on how it’ll become itself and focus on working. As Tam best puts it, “Constantly questioning what if and how and but is the quickest way to kill your manifestations. DO NOT DO IT” because essentially if you keep looking out for your dream to come then you don’t already believe it’s yours and it’s coming, instead you’re estranged to your desirability still. Lastly, be grateful by reflecting on what your wished for that already did come to pass and is now yours. Don’t engage with your inner critic who might not make you want to chase after your bigger desires because
being thankful in all you already have you allow for openness for more to come- high frequency- more that can come into your life law of attraction. The law of attraction is something we will soon come to know but there was something I mentioned earlier that everything works out for me mindset, a motto so to speak of the community that cause picks the backlash of many because if someone’s saying this only internally as a confidence booster, I for one, say fine but to sell this message to younger audiences that don’t even have even control over their lives without their parents/guardians and are going puberty concerns some rightfully so but what I’ve concluded is lucky girl syndrome just like delulu is a trend, it’s rises to fall and the reason for certain aspects of it like it’s name for example are all part of the marketing that benefits those endorsing this although not everyone has ill intent, there is an elephant in the room. Well, a baby elephant I’ll say.
Lastly, on this topic I’d address it which is the naming of delulu which is short for delusional and lucky girl syndrome, specifically the last part, syndrome. Both of these are actually medical terms that fall order actually clinical mental/psychological disorders and do indeed cause mental health issues for people yet they have gotten redefined for cutie little videos on TikTok. Why would anyone call something after a mental illness? Well unfortunately just like aesthetic and books have trended on TikTok so has mental illness, the awareness of them as well as the subsequent self diagnosis phenomenon. According to Banner Health, “We’ve seen an explosion of Tourette-like tics in our unit and every single case has been linked with watching countless TikTok videos about people with Tourette syndrome,” Dr. Adelayo said. “These kids don’t have Tourette’s, but they aren’t pretending either. They have a functional movement disorder as a result of stress and possibly underlying anxiety or depression which may or may not have been properly diagnosed.” As well Dr. Adelayo added, “The ages of 11 to 17 are particularly susceptible to social influence,” Dr. Adelayo. “These TikTok channels can create a sense of community and inclusiveness for this age group, but they can also be a slippery slope.” This slippery slope as mentioned for with the toxic positivity is proven as we see to be a reality of many young teenagers, I see it first hand being on TikTok how the may ways people describe either having or reporting on a mental illness leads to a comment section of why do I feel like I might have this? To consume and believe so much that your normal might be something disordered rather than just normal human emotions,habits or thinking process can lead to other actual clinical diagnosis like an anxiety disorder like hypochondria. The reason why I referred to this serious problem as a baby elephant is because any person that use these terms are just reading what it’s called and more often than not doesn’t question why a real word is being turned into another less serious world because of how often it happens and overlooked it is yet this desensitization in any case isn’t good. With one simple google search like Dr. Adelayo described how many young people are running to the doctor with a diagnosis already in hand and when they are told they have misdiagnosis themselves some don’t believe it. As manifestations which lucky girl syndrome supports, words are important and matter, so when you speak upon yourself I have a syndrome, although in this case as a whole it’s something positive, it does cause an affect on your view of self.
Just to verify, What is Reality?
Ah, the have and have nots. The privilege and marginalized. The lucky girls and unlucky…. boy? No, not just boys, girls, non-binaries, anyone really can be unlucky, and my lucky can be your unlucky. Vise Vera. That’s reality, or at least part of it. Essentially, reality is perspective. Next chapter. Unless you care to hear about what if you were living in someone else’s lie? See the future we travel into the delulu and the Laws of the Universe the more that that openmind I asked for in the beginning is going to come in handy because to fully absorb many of these ideas that might be new to you as they were to me you need to understand just how probable they are and do that realize how unrealistic your own reality is. The most universal way is think about your childhood, all the memories that you half remember that can very well be half truths, the moments that you can’t even recall but your parents tell you stories of, was that not your reality just because it’s vague to you? Oh well I was a toddler how could I possibly remember? What were you doing 6 years ago on this same month and day at whatever time you are reading this? Does that seem like an absurd question to ask? Exactly my point, at the heart delulu is absurdism, whether it’s for fantasy of a crush or believing in speaking things into existence, both are what our current society would consider as absurd yet is our current society one to talk? (For many reasons no, just no, no) If you don’t live alone the reality, ideas and perspectives that you have on where you live and the people you’re living with are all different along you are all living at the same time, same place. That’s reality and how faulty it can be. Reality is not our sole truth, rather our state of the mind builds into that if not can be more powering than our physical surrounding if you know how to use it in such way. A social example of this is the romanticization of the 50’s in America. People who have lived during that time and more absurd even those who don’t have this wanderlust almost nostalgic missing of a time that never existed. The romanization lays in a time that was a Golden Age yet significant events such as heavy segregation, the Korean war beginning, Emmit Till’s brutal murder and bizarre extreme social normality of misogyny, yet this was a time to miss? If you are currently an older straight, able-bodied, white man who was alive in the 50’s and was financially stable then very well you might have viewed it and remember it as a Golden Age of a peacefully more simpler time and this is truly your experience and reality yet this can never excuse from the gruesome treatment marginalized groups got treated and seen as normal like public lynching of black bodies. This shows how the life of someone whose life can be a lie to your reality, what was great for them wasn’t at all subjectively.
To forward explain the absurdism of life point, think about people who live much different lifestyles from you. Maybe a princess or prince compared to you, not to assume but possibly a working class person. Although I was thinking more on the literature genre of absurdism and the tale of a fictional book of a man just narrating his life fulfilling that category. That book being The Stranger by Albert Camus where we hear the story of the days from our unreliable narrator Mersulat who is a nihilist someone who believes in, “the rejection of all religious and moral principles, in the belief that life is meaningless” courtesies of Google dictionary. To give you an idea the book begins with “Mother died today. Or maybe yesterday; I can't be sure. I had been right, I was still right, I was always right. I had lived my life one way and I could just as well have lived it another.” Can we believe what this narrator protagonist is telling us about other characters if he cares so little to know about his own physical world to remember when his own mother died? Absurdism. Yet people in life really do define as nihilist and on top of that have other psychological conditions or mental illnesses where their reality really does involve delusions like psychosis. Even neurotypical people have strange tendencies just based on human nature, see the psychology behind how infatuation/ love can physically 
It’s stressed by now just how much of what we consider our reality is a mixture of what our senses account for in the society and physicality around us as well as how were perceive it to be, now if you can you’re thinking can you really change your life, can it really reflect physically? The answer is yes :) but you should keep on reading to find out how anyways because “It’s about 
The Laws of the Universe
THIS CHART BELONGS AND COMES FROM: MBG MINDFULNESS (CLICK LINK FOR MORE)
Vocabulary
Before we get into the more thick details, I selected some words that specifically come up which I suggest we should talk about so that it’s understood later on:
.Vibration= a law of the universe, EVERYTHING VIBRATES, NOTHING REST .Frequencies= “the rate at which a vibration occurs that constitutes a wave, either in a material (as in sound waves), or in an electromagnetic field (as in radio waves and light), usually measured per second.” -Google Dictionary
.Unconscious mind- - the desires and memories that we don't actively think about.
IMPORTANT video I suggest you watch
Seeing is believing so as much as I hope you’re following along, I do think that a hope help to this would be to actually see how vibrations and frequencies work which is shown in this video: Cymatics: Chladni Plate - Sound, Vibration and Sand , Nature contains natural frequencies and if you place rice, water or sand on a surface and make a sound by hitting a drum for example at the certain frequency the grains or water will move itself into that certain frequency shape. Check it out, this will help to show you that vibrations and frequencies are indeed real but also 
The Law of Attraction
At last, we have arrived at our first law, attraction. I watched a video from Bob Proctor, “New York Times bestselling author, motivational speaker, success coach, and expert on the human mind” according to levishowes.com and a contributor to the infamous book and movie on this law and the law of vibration called The Secret. I’ll explain sequential how this law works step by step based on Bob’s research.
Just like the law of gravity which we are all more familiar with, the Law of Attraction is always here, always at work. The human body is a “molecular structure, mass of energy, high speed of vibration, if looked at body through microscope you’ll see it dancing, even of the dead.” The conscious mind (we’ll label as c) is the educated mind and subconscious mind (sc) is the emotional mind. The SC has been programmed, information from the world is learnt by the C as an infant and formed in the SC a paradigm which is stored information, habits basically the product of your environment. Before paradigm you are just a product of genes. Paradigm is x (just a placeholder letter) type energy, on a C level, you have the ability to think anything leads to you building an idea leads to power to C. THIS POWER TO AND THROUGH YOU. 
Vibration is a law of the universe, EVERYTHING VIBRATES, ALL THE TIME NOTHING REST. Thoughts you think frame your sc which determines your vibration that dictates what you attract. “You attract energy” and people that “are in harmony with you” hence the meaning of you attract what vibrations are on the same frequency as yours. Everything operates on frequencies, there are infinite number of frequencies. The paradigm controls vibration, changing thinking is not enough, to change your vibration you have to change your paradigm such as habits. So essentially, changing the paradigm attracts different, new things, programming in positive information. The results show in feelings ( c )conscious mind awareness of the vibration we’re in. Bad feelings, negative vibration, vise versa. You can never attract to you until you change your frequency.
I agree with this explanation from Bob however I began to watch The Secret and I didn’t get very far because I did not agree with the way it was being delivered. It was in a way I found to be very dismissive of real life circumstances and instead blames people for not knowing “the secret” themselves and if only people knew they could be living out their idealized version of their life not taking into account that consist work that gots into mentally reprogramming your mind nor the factors that do give people privileges in life and don’t allow us all to start off from the same playing field. Something I quoted from the documentary was “There’s a reason why people at 1% are at the 1% they know the secret.” Bob shares his story of his how income went from 4,000 to 175, 000 in a year then over a million later on after a man gave him a book in 1961 and followed what he told him and in 9 in a half years he understood fully what happened being the law of attraction he learnt but I can’t help to stop this train of thinking by having to mention that Bob is a well off, white, straight, able-body man and that certainly plays into many people in the 1% looking like him, not just because this group of similar identity people are so enlightened that they know “the secret” that every day society just wouldn’t understand. This logic creates separation not only within the law of attraction which is the opposite of what the laws of the universe even stand for but it also created this elitism of people who attribute their wealth or success in life to themselves rather than seeing that they have certain factors that allowed for their success to happen and they aren’t better than any other human due to it, not to say Bob was saying he was better than others but the logics sound too slippery of a slope to this problematic rhetoric. Something I do want to touch on before moving on is a tactic that people who believe in the law of attraction similarly believe in as well which is the abundance mindset which is basically do not live in scarcity, things will always return back to you, share, give, use, reuse and do it all with a clear conscience which is something I do believe in as well and Bob touched on and is an important tool to use in your warehouse of a brain in life even if there are certain parts of any of these laws that you don’t fully agree with, I’d say it’s nice to be thinking critically enough where you can pick and choose what you’ll like to adapt into your life and what you’ll like to no so much.
The Law of Attribution
Growing up, when you would do something good or successful would your parents tell you “good job” or “you worked hard!” Starting from childhood this law show itself in how our parents talk to us and what we attributed their compliments or critics of us to, was it due to something eternal to us that just happened or something internal that was to our credit or to blame us? The Law of Attribution is the ‘why’ things happened of the good and bad in our life in cognitive positive. There was a study done with subjectively successful people to see how their mindsets shape what they attribute their success to and we got it broken down in three categories. Dr. Ana a Youtuber and real postdoctoral therapist that makes videos on psychoeducation list the three as the first one being Locus of Control which speaks on if you contribute internal meaning something coming from inside you or external outside of you. AN example if stumping your toe (internal sounds like man I’m so dumb, why can’t I just watch where I’m going. External sounds more like ow, you know what, maybe I should move this table somewhere else. Secondly stability, how stable do you believe an occasion to be? (High stability, I’m never going to make enough money to move out of my apartment, I’m always going to be unhappy here because I just don’t make enough. Low stability is you know what, I don’t see a way at this moment but what I can do is start to save and maybe if I keep looking on the internet and even get in touch with some real estate people I’d be able to find a new apartment I like more than this one in the next 3 years.) Third and last we have controllability meaning how in control something is for you or not.(High controllability is Man if I only left this online relationship sooner I would’ve had a lot less emotional damage at this point than keep dragging it on although my partner was telling me months ago a breakup was the only place we were heading compared to low controllability I really wasn’t at a good place mentally a few months ago and neither was my partner, we both needed each other and although it had to end it feels better for it ending now that we are both in better places physically in our lives than a few months ago where I don’t think I would’ve been able to handle it.) As we can see all of these are dealing with self talk and the way you speak to yourself and how it negotiates whether you blame your rather then constructively criticizing yourself or if your praise everything you do compared to highlighting moments of true hard work not just anything and everything as some parents do for their child. Although that is out of a loving place as Dr. Ana says “It’s not good to tell yourself there’s something stable about you that you can’t control.” Humans, children or adults are not going to do a good job or get highest grades all the time, but whether you study hard is something that’s way more in your control. The photo below tell the results that a successful chooses to follow along with some theories that stems from the Law of Attribution and if you’ll like to learn more on this topic I highly suggest Dr. Ana’s video here: This mindset sets you up for success, according to research but this is the main point and gist of it all.
Something Old, Something New
Allow me to interrupt all the remarkable laws of the universe to bring up an older not necessarily law but big rule with many tips we sound about called Lucky Girl Syndrome, in relation to The Law of Attribution now that we know both here’s why I distinguished the syndrome to be a TikTok trend. It’s clear that it has gotten many things right in it’s rules that the Laws of the Universe would approve of from prompting manifestation and rewiring your thoughts and mindset which we see is a real devices to use and see results from based off of the Law of Attraction. However, it is through the law of attribution we can see that the attribution lucky girl syndrome plays off of is the problematic factor which is ones self. These ancient laws apply timelessly to anyone who’ll like to use it whereas by definition luckiness is, “an auspicious state resulting from favorable outcomes” according to Vocabulary.com. By the law, a technique of past events, reality in it’s current physical state and what’s in your control adds up to how someone should evaluate their outcome for a certain stimuli happening and think critically which is important in a midst of positivity and aiming for high vibrations in the talk that both the law of attraction and lucky girl syndrome are guilty of. Accessing a situation to see how you can gain the best situation out of it based on awareness and blindly believing life events that you desire are just going to work out for you because everything just works out for me are not equivalent although neither are wrong. You have to change your paradigm which includes the things installed in you not just your thinking but your habits and when many of these short seconds to 1 minute and some long videos talk about luckiness it’s never in depth enough to grasp this part of the meaning as well. I believe the people proclaiming luckiness upon themselves as well as I believe the science. If done without bias or spite in mind for another else thinking of yourself as lucky look a gratitude lens is so special in itself because gratitude is something needed to raise your vibrations in the first place thus your desires and hopes coming to you so it’s not wrong by a long shot but it’s also not inclusive enough in phrasing or scientifically proven enough to be considered a Law of the Universe nor too much more than being associated with it’s TikTok roots.
Science behind the law of attraction and manifestation and how to use it (Quantum Physics)
At last we are at our final Law of the Universe that we will be discussing today. This does led into more of the out there beliefs towards the end but nevertheless it’s something I found informative and is used so it’s more than worth talking about for others to learn from as well. This information is driven from Devi Sietaram’s channel who has a PhD in science engineering and a deep interest in study psychology, law of attraction, quantum physics and manifestation. Again, I’ll be detailing it step on step.
The video began with this message so, so will I, manifestation is not witchcraft, against some popular belief. Sound frequencies (sound travels in waves, high pitch, decibels, low pitch, photons for light frequency form wave patterns in space) sound and light are on a septum from least to absolute most. We humans are only able to perceive about 1% of sound frequencies and 0.0035% of light frequencies. Any particle in the universe has frequencies supported by the Wave Particle Duality theory invented from Heisenberg. This means what our physical senses can absorb is a small amount- manifestation is one of those frequencies from the non physical world. (Hence the reality talk from earlier, you can’t sense all that’s around you but that doesn’t make them not real).
Emotions are a frequency which feels like an epiphany to realize.
On chart: Lower vibration= negative mood, Higher vibration= positive mood. Highest Parts or beyond the chart is consider= divine/ other realm of positivity which are the vibrations we can not observe with our natural senses (5th, 4th dimension). It’s important to keep in mind this chart is made off of humanly observation and being that some elements of spirituality that exist in our world we can’t physically see or sense but exist can mean more than just the highest vibration listened on the chart.
Now I do know I’ve mention Quantum Physics and I’m not to to sugarcoat it, Quantum Physics is something that even people studying that field of world don’t fully understand yet so as I found that this is where the science stays to stray off of my topic I decided to stop my exploration here but there was something I thought was worth mentioning about it which is what I’ve gather from more than one person that spoke about the Laws of the Universe is, at least considering this topic, a version of you in a different universe that is living out your desires which leads this universe you to have the desires you do. So the different dimensions we just mentioned, does have another you, many yous according to this which physics Elisten supported using his relativity theory that stated “destruction of mass and energy in one and a jump to another.”
You can tap into their reality and live as they do because they are you, just from another reality…. Yeah. Take this as you will, as it makes complete sense or something that you question either way it is interesting and more importantly is something that is believed but something that Devi mentioned that I think is good to be used even outside of Quantum Physics content is when you see other people living out the life that you want, don’t feel discourage and think that their life was always meant for them and you can never achieve that, rather use it as a sign that look, someone else can seemingly live the life that you desire so if anything it just means that your desires are not impossible and with the abundance mindset we spoke of before there’s enough of desires coming through to go around.
Overcoming the Fear of Being Seen (The Spotlight effect)
This is the Spotlight effect.
Youtuber on content for women to achieve their highest femininity and goals Vickita Trivedi made a video on how to overcome this effect that holds many back and embrace who you want to be without hiding. She starts off with a tale about a parrot in a gold cage, the parrot speaks on and on about wanting to leave the cage where the man of where the cage is owns. Another man comes by and hears the bird and opens the cage for him but yet the parrot doesn’t fly out, it stays and complains, the man tries to pull the parrot out and it still never leaves the cage, it has trapped itself mentally although physically it is now free and this is a metaphor to how people’s comfort zones will trap them in places that don’t help them to grow but yet they choose the comfort and even with opportunities ahead of them they never go after it over fear of leaving the comfort place. Don’t be the parrot in the golden cage.
Vickita give three tips on how to escape the spotlight effect and be free within and of yourself. Step 1, understanding life experience lead to a range of the basic human need for stabilities in different levels of safety and comfort. People are critics and can be haters that holds people back, but be free. Realize ‘it’s not a me problem, it’s a them problem’, don’t dim your light for others comfort because it will leave you to squeeze into uncomfortable situations for you. Don’t use others' perspective of you as a scapegoat for why you stay where you are. Step 2, know rejection. Many play it small in relationships and put people on pedestals, that don’t deserve it. Rejection of self being imposter syndrome, don’t be afraid of wondering if you’re deserving of your blessings, perception is never in your control, ( ex. Money, if you come into an abundance of money, don’t fear if others will think you’re pretentious now, focus on your character, if you were a good person from before/now, then after the life change you can remain a good person, money wouldn’t overshadow you, it’ll exacerbate your qualities.) Don’t run from attention because not all attention is bad attention, “get comfortable with your appearance and get comfortable with your mouth” meaning be able to have knowledge on topics and ability to hold a conversation and stand up for yourself through your education. Lastly, step 3, pursue the fear of getting embarrassed. Gain mental resilience when you do something unknown and now it’s outcome is revealed to you. “No. My thoughts are not controlling me, I am not my life and my thoughts will not prevent me from living my dream life.” Attack your fear. Change your routine = change your life. “No one is giving you an update for your brain wiring.” Yes, you have a past, reason for your doings and habits, yes you have genetic disorders but the change you want doesn’t just come from your brain, it comes from you, forcefully, actively. These tips especially the last one can feel scary to attempt because it is scary to do a life changing thing in front of people, I think part of human nature too is to judge, compete, compare and critic others although we are in total control of that, but if you get the work done on yourself in silence then when you feel ready to attack your spotlight fear, you should feel rewarded in who you have became.
The Obsession of Confidence
As I’ve reached my final point, I am going to round back to delulu as all of these points are to give a well rounded perspective of all delulu can offer and it’s proven historical factors that support this new term but ages past idea. I can’t think of a way that delulu has been used where it doesn’t ooze some kind of confidence. That’s the point of it practically, as a joke or something for real, it’s reason for being is to think outside of the box, outside of your everyday life and do what your fantizes want from you, that alone is confidence. This confidence however has become a subtrend of it’s own and while may have pointed it out content creator Elliot Sang made a 50 minute long video on the topic that gained to date 202K views. One of the main points he draws in the video is this hyper-obsession with men using their masculinity and women using their femininity and combining it with obscured, outdated ideologies to reprogram themselves to believe they are essentially othered from other women and men because their existence is just that much more significant and they’re trying to get those who are not yet tapped into their mindset and lifestyle to join abroad. This would be referring to self-proclaimed Alpha-males and high- value women. Some can say they are using the delulu we've spoken about so seriously that their reprogramming has became in a way a cult-like fan basis because of how appealing they make their content to those who might be looking into how can I change myself? Andrew Tate which I cringe at even having to tate is the posterboy for “Alpha-males” which is just toxic masculinity to keep it true and short, any of the rhetoric you can listen to from one of these men sound nothing far from that nor from being very misogynistic yet people like Andrew are able to make a lot of money by promoting this on platforms like Twitter where anything goes and selling courses for other men to absorb this complete toxicity too. High value women on the other hand I have to say out the bat, are far less a threat to society than the opposite being that they don’t actually send physical harm to those who they disagree with and have been imprisoned for. No, if anything what high value women stand on is the definite hyper-feminity that could very well be viewed as toxic femininity in the effort of improving things about yourself like your income, mindset, confidence of course and appearance. One of the main poster girls for this movement is Thewizardliz who has current 5.21M subscribers with 69 videos out and stands out for her shock factor titles such as “How to stop being lazy and pathetic”, “How to receive Princess Treatment”, “Becoming selfish is the best thing I ever did”, “How to stop being a clown” and the list goes on.
I was completely unwilling to watch an “Alpha-Male” video because I’m aware how much misogyny and “locker room talk” goes into the videos making them repulsively gross to me but the high value women one I did walk and have dabble in before this as well. I would say for Liz that she truthfully lives in what she says (based off of what we see on camera) and when she has these shocking titles it’s not just for shock factor, she actually means it and doesn’t double down in the video which I find sincere. As much as people can say high value women are the opposite of “Alpha-men”, I just don’t see that they can be true be true because of all that women as a whole are subjected to by men muchless “Alpha-men” who are the epiphany of threats these women will deal with being that the two groups notoriously do NOT get along and the men often throw stones first in a way that patriarchy benefits them for so it’ll never be equivalent or an even playing field. Yet, I do see conflicts within Liz’s content because of who she is being a straight forward harsh speaker, some comments do come off as she’s speaking directly to you the listener and it can be damaging especially to the younger audience of girls. There are always people in the comments telling younger girls to take what she’s saying with a grain of salt but also I notice not necessarily from Liz but from the community as a whole that some of the advice given in changing lifestyle and appearance are to attract a husband which I’m not going to bash on because maybe that is someone’s desire but if not delivered in an inclusive way it not only excludes queer women but also some of the specific tips given feel very reminiscent of 1950’s housewives in where pleasing your husband is your first goal then your children then your appearance/external then maybe your mental welling and these videos are scary because for a woman of this day and age to willing give up submission to attract something that’s not here already but already give up so much of herself for the idealistic man that may not even come in the way she is imaging can be a shocking reality to deal with and does rub may women who see how old-fashion oppressive this seems.
Elliot Sang made a very engaging, informational video essay on the topic that did something really cool which was include many other voices of content creators that their audiences might view as confidence and talk about their relationship to the trend and word. The interviewees includes a pleasing diversity of binary, non-binary, queer, straight, multiple abilities content creators, I have a link here:Everybody is Obsessed With 'Confidence' that begins at a certain conversation that bring up the point of being delusional which you can watch if you please but it’s also worth giving the world video a watch to learn about this phenomenon and how something such as confidence has earned it’s title by many others a a cult-like following fan basis.
Laws of the Universe, Quantum Physics, Human Nature, Oh my! But where’s Delulu?
What a deep long dive that was. As your writer, my goal was all in getting you to believe that whatever you want ot achieve, become and live as/in, through positive thinking it’s positive. Being positively delusional has changed by life for the better although I most say something that might shock you, after all of this chapters of work I know that I am not longer a delulu girl. As I mentioned earlier I was in a time in my life where I was dealing with extreme pressure and in a classroom environment with favoritism and a group of us not favorites who practically were bullied by our teacher, it wasn’t healthy for any of us and I saw the effects on my fellow friends and classmates. I didn’t know at the time but what I began to do as I declared to myself one day after having enough that I was going to completely block this person out of existence from my life, although their were physically in the room, they meant indifference to me because I did not want to allow their insults and negativity into my psyche and it worked, I tried so hard inside but I was able to regain who I was before the experience, help others through what I was feeling and most blessings grow and become even more internally strong and confident than who I was before and let me just tell you, if you can leave an experience feeling like you were able to work though the hardships and turn it around to benefit you so you can actually grow through what you were going through, that feels like success to me. It feels like a blessing.
I do want to give tribute to some religions, faith/spirituality beliefs and lifestyles I came across along the way that feel like delulu strings from spects of their nature, one being Rastafarians who practice and believe in manifestation for their religion, Taoism specifically synchronicity that talks about the connection we all have to the events that occur in our lives, to the Earth and for us a human beings connected to the universe and Drag ballroom culture for unarguably drag queens being one of the most empowering, inspiring, embodying art forms of delulu of it’s most positivity use. By the end of all my research I came to an epiphany, that the whole purpose why people choose to be delulu/ positively delusional/ positive thinking over matter in the first place is to feel worthy.
Worthy of your wildest dreams or your most outlandish scenarios of a lover. To be confident is to feel worthy, that’s the purpose, that’s the ultimate purpose for doing and being delulu. When I look back at what I was dealing with those years ago, the tears and lost hair and much more, I went through so much mental strength without having a support team to explain exactly how I was choosing to turn the situation around and to stay consistent it took so much work but I’m really proud of myself that I did it. Yet, I now, in a very different reality of my life choose to live in creating me, not necessarily through positivity delusions anymore because now I already do feel worthy, but instead through positivity and self love, the work wouldn’t go towards recreating but building on what was already created and keep on growing. Delulu really is a dear friend and I know I’ll always her close for if I ever need little sprinkles of her in my life again which in this unpredictable life I just might but I have experience now of what flowing positivity feels like and I can use that to attribute to. I don’t need to go back to where I was mentally or physically again and now I’m free and for the sorrow and joys I’ve experience and will continue to experience all I seek now is a harmony because I’m grateful, I’m so very grateful, to delulu, to the epiphanies I’ve had from learning from others, for the good time, for the growth.
Thank you for reading.
(which just “nothing ever works out for me” mindset, yes things can and DO work out for you)
References:
· https://youtu.be/PPcUA_sxJHk?si=aCGFnxhUmOGVXnwe – Tam Kaur ‘ Lucky Girl Syndrome’
· https://youtu.be/5zvnFM2BXqY?si=PBjes9EvnosfzgfH – Proctor Gallagher Institute ‘The Law of Attracted Explained’
· https://youtu.be/uvydur4GF7E?si=SAmesIR7fVPYkSzp -‘How to overcome the fear of being seen (the spotlight effect)’ – Vickita Trivedi
· https://www.shape.com/lucky-girl-syndrome-tiktok-7093118 - ‘SHAPE’ Law of assumption
· https://www.theguardian.com/technology/2022/oct/30/tiktok-mental-health-social-media
· https://youtu.be/WWXmr222TV4?si=PgpolksmTO6byiwJ – Bria Jones how to be Delulu and use it to your benefit
· https://youtu.be/achqQvIqUHQ?si=92keMp8DJUL8jcMJ – The Art of synchronicity
· https://youtu.be/D_gAFOhFHj4?si=dOZoQDob7hAeMaR3 – 7 Laws of Attraction
· https://youtu.be/6sYC8JFF0YQ?si=hva5MxHsHIx3o_7U – everyone wants to be confident
· https://youtu.be/KipC-mkazjg?si=_lK8LHfSG2FNzaWj – the mindset of successful people (Law of Attribution)
· https://youtu.be/75oOxRlI-DY?si=dL8OZ322VPRmg6qI – Everything I want comes my way subliminal (use)
· https://youtu.be/D-P9IhAvzTE?si=PSazGKqrQHUNwr3h – Diana Ross ‘attraction’ interview video
· THE TWO MOVIES and ted talk and rice vibration videso
· https://youtu.be/pP4OHz_vwwU?si=Plwfeh-tDIWaKVO_ - Science to manifestation, quantum physics and manifesting desires +
· https://www.mindbodygreen.com/articles/the-12-universal-laws-and-how-to-practice-them -universal laws
-https://lewishowes.com/podcast/the-law-of-attraction-creating-wealth-manifesting-abundance-w-bob-proctor/#:~:text=Bob%20Proctor%20is%20a%20New,for%20it%20in%20the%20future. - Bob Proctor Bio
· https://images.app.goo.gl/sqCPGCAJy2eu8HUn6 - Freud unconcious mind ice berg
-https://www.bannerhealth.com/healthcareblog/advise-me/tiktok-self-diagnoses-on-the-rise-why-its-harmful - Self Diagnosising TikTok
